Friday, November 4, 2011
Quote November 04, 2011
Half Past Kissing Time: accused of intentionally sketching pornographic zombies
Monday, October 31, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Quotes - June 7, 2011
Lola is 40 : Demons have no attention span to speak of.
Too Many Mornings : I feel a great deal of affection for the talk-radio host because his brain’s so wonderfully fucked up.
Radiovixen : the miracle of life in my barbecue grill.
Fetch My Flying Monkeys : I’ll be like a goat Moses.
Absolutely Narcissism : COMFY panties that DON'T give my vulva rope burn
Too Many Mornings : I feel a great deal of affection for the talk-radio host because his brain’s so wonderfully fucked up.
Radiovixen : the miracle of life in my barbecue grill.
Fetch My Flying Monkeys : I’ll be like a goat Moses.
Absolutely Narcissism : COMFY panties that DON'T give my vulva rope burn
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Quotes - February 5, 2011
The Bloggess : I pointed out that unexpected pandas are good practice for when you have a home invasion because if you aren’t rattled by spontaneous pandas then you’re probably going to be able to keep your cool during the zombie apocalypse.
Fetch My Flying Monkeys : What kind of hippy voodoo bullshit is this?
Funny or Snot : If he's not walking by Thursday, he's going to a different kind of church. You know the kind where they slap the sick kid on the forehead and cry "Heal Child". I need a professional because it didn't work when I tried it at home.
As Cape Cod Turns : we called it "musical beds"
Motherhood Uncensored : I know a few people who need to be put in a "LOL" time out.
Lola is 40 : At what point does a backyard officially become a cemetery?
Fetch My Flying Monkeys : What kind of hippy voodoo bullshit is this?
Funny or Snot : If he's not walking by Thursday, he's going to a different kind of church. You know the kind where they slap the sick kid on the forehead and cry "Heal Child". I need a professional because it didn't work when I tried it at home.
As Cape Cod Turns : we called it "musical beds"
Motherhood Uncensored : I know a few people who need to be put in a "LOL" time out.
Lola is 40 : At what point does a backyard officially become a cemetery?
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Quotes - January 23, 2011
Funny or Snot : I certainly wasn’t expecting to lose my bra somewhere in the Portland Rose Gardens
Parenting By Dummies : he sounds distinctively like one small, green Jedi master
Speaking From The Crib : What if his thingy melted off?
Adventures In Paradise : I was much too busy bonding with the strippers over our shared love of leg warmers and vagina glitter to have a drink
Highly Irritable : I spent my Christmas break learning Bakugan attributes forcibly at the hands of a tyrant in a Transformers housecoat,
Day By Day : I see the benefit of being a nudist
Parenting By Dummies : he sounds distinctively like one small, green Jedi master
Speaking From The Crib : What if his thingy melted off?
Adventures In Paradise : I was much too busy bonding with the strippers over our shared love of leg warmers and vagina glitter to have a drink
Highly Irritable : I spent my Christmas break learning Bakugan attributes forcibly at the hands of a tyrant in a Transformers housecoat,
Day By Day : I see the benefit of being a nudist
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Quotes - January 9, 2011
Absolutely Narcissism : He will then run into the newly painted bedroom naked, stand against one of the fully painted walls, and say, "How do I look in pink?" which translates to "Let's do it while the kids are all downstairs."
Patchwork Times : Once upon a time, I thought that maybe that wasn’t a balanced meal but then I realized as long as there’s lots of gravy, who cares?
Busted Plumbing : I smelled like five day old waffles that have been sitting at the bottom of your sink that you forgot to clean out before you left for a short trip. Sweet and homeless-man's-asshole, that's how I smelled.
It’s Not All Mary Poppins : There may even have been some Potty Dancing around the puddle of steaming dampness.
Patchwork Times : Once upon a time, I thought that maybe that wasn’t a balanced meal but then I realized as long as there’s lots of gravy, who cares?
Busted Plumbing : I smelled like five day old waffles that have been sitting at the bottom of your sink that you forgot to clean out before you left for a short trip. Sweet and homeless-man's-asshole, that's how I smelled.
It’s Not All Mary Poppins : There may even have been some Potty Dancing around the puddle of steaming dampness.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Quotes - December 31, 2010
Adaption of Jane : I should have just asked her to put a paper bag on her head
Suburban Turmoil : I feel like my life has become one eternal snow day.
Barefoot Foodie : basically, we all agreed (by we, I mean, me, my doctor and my percoset bottle) that I am having pain.
Steam Me Up Kid : I promise I won't fart in your treatment cubicle again.
Suburban Turmoil : I feel like my life has become one eternal snow day.
Barefoot Foodie : basically, we all agreed (by we, I mean, me, my doctor and my percoset bottle) that I am having pain.
Steam Me Up Kid : I promise I won't fart in your treatment cubicle again.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Quotes - December 17, 2010
I Make Soap : nothing says "I love you" like a couple of bite size snickers and a juice box.
Unknown Mami : I was so mad, I woke him up and thanked him for ruining my dream with his stinky farts.
My Own Brand of Crazy : That's where I learned about political leaders.......like Genghis Kahn!
Alone With Cats : Maybe people wouldn’t hate terrorists so much if they attacked us with baked goods. Unless the baked goods weren’t delish. That would really hit us where it hurts. I should probably stop giving advice to al-Qaeda.
Yo Mama’s Blog : Dry Humping In The Front Yard Is A No-No
http://yo-mamasblog.blogspot.com/2010/12/because-im-cheap-ass.html
Pregnant Chicken : When I first saw this I was beyond WTF? (and I went to art college)
Unknown Mami : I am a brilliant typo-ist!!!
Unknown Mami : I was so mad, I woke him up and thanked him for ruining my dream with his stinky farts.
My Own Brand of Crazy : That's where I learned about political leaders.......like Genghis Kahn!
Alone With Cats : Maybe people wouldn’t hate terrorists so much if they attacked us with baked goods. Unless the baked goods weren’t delish. That would really hit us where it hurts. I should probably stop giving advice to al-Qaeda.
Yo Mama’s Blog : Dry Humping In The Front Yard Is A No-No
http://yo-mamasblog.blogspot.com/2010/12/because-im-cheap-ass.html
Pregnant Chicken : When I first saw this I was beyond WTF? (and I went to art college)
Unknown Mami : I am a brilliant typo-ist!!!
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Quotes - October 14, 2010
I am SO sorry I haven't posted lately - at least I was still collecting your funniness.
The Queen of WTF : From this day forward she will be formally known as... Dame of the Penis Platter.
The Bloggess : My grandmother always used to say “living well is the best revenge” but I suspect that’s just because she’d never considered arson.
It’s Not All Mary Poppins : It’s big! It’s the CN Tower!!! It’s the Eiffel Tower!!!!! It’s… it’s… it’s… It’s my PENIS!!!
Lyn Upside Down : I'm still suffering a velveeta hangover a day later.
Sara Spelled Without an H : Wrong, you pizza communists
Barefoot Foodie : I bought these really amazing heels from Bakers. Which is where you go when you want shoes sexier than you could find at JC Penny, but not so sexy they are clear and come with pole traction.
Astoria Rust : it has about as much charm as a prison bus.
Unknown Mami : If I say my mood is at it’s worsest, it’s best not to correct my grammar at that moment.
The Gypsy Life : Did you know that this pregnant woman can indeed fit into the refigerator??
Finding Fairytales : we're curing depression...one red bull at a time.
••••••••••••••••••
The Queen of WTF : From this day forward she will be formally known as... Dame of the Penis Platter.
The Bloggess : My grandmother always used to say “living well is the best revenge” but I suspect that’s just because she’d never considered arson.
It’s Not All Mary Poppins : It’s big! It’s the CN Tower!!! It’s the Eiffel Tower!!!!! It’s… it’s… it’s… It’s my PENIS!!!
Lyn Upside Down : I'm still suffering a velveeta hangover a day later.
Sara Spelled Without an H : Wrong, you pizza communists
Barefoot Foodie : I bought these really amazing heels from Bakers. Which is where you go when you want shoes sexier than you could find at JC Penny, but not so sexy they are clear and come with pole traction.
Astoria Rust : it has about as much charm as a prison bus.
Unknown Mami : If I say my mood is at it’s worsest, it’s best not to correct my grammar at that moment.
The Gypsy Life : Did you know that this pregnant woman can indeed fit into the refigerator??
Finding Fairytales : we're curing depression...one red bull at a time.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Quotes - August 18, 2010
It’s Not All Mary Poppins : Three poops? A poo in triplicate! A poo trifecta.
Away We Go : we engaged in a turf battle with Ye Olde Teenagers and their ancient squirt-muskets of annoyance.
The Monster Apathy : I think we can all agree that the moral of the story holds true: Don't fuck with someone who can launch fireworks out of their dick.
Alone With Cats : I pretty much do whatever the Indigo Girls tell me to do
Funny or Snot : Did you know fly paper can trap a parakeet as well as flies?
Queen of WTF : I may lose my pickled gin soaked little toe to the mouse trap I just set by the liquor cabinet.
Funny Not Slutty : I suspect suspect there is a sadistic, secret math society at work continually creating a gap between every generation.
Speaking From The Crib : I averted the clitoris question.
Away We Go : we engaged in a turf battle with Ye Olde Teenagers and their ancient squirt-muskets of annoyance.
The Monster Apathy : I think we can all agree that the moral of the story holds true: Don't fuck with someone who can launch fireworks out of their dick.
Alone With Cats : I pretty much do whatever the Indigo Girls tell me to do
Funny or Snot : Did you know fly paper can trap a parakeet as well as flies?
Queen of WTF : I may lose my pickled gin soaked little toe to the mouse trap I just set by the liquor cabinet.
Funny Not Slutty : I suspect suspect there is a sadistic, secret math society at work continually creating a gap between every generation.
Speaking From The Crib : I averted the clitoris question.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Quotes - July 22, 2010
Astoria Oregon Rust : There are cow dreams, elephant dreams and even whale dreams.
Adventures In Paradise : And that? That is when I realized. They thought I was a hooker.
The Duchess Of Dorkville : She sounds like a hippo getting ass-raped.
Sassy Pants Freckle Face : Talk it over with your creatures before hand that way the bear bitches don't rape you with 6$ bear panties
The Fourth Blog Frog : One piece of anatomy I didn't need help locating was my right ovary -- because I'm pretty sure I dislodged it trying to do a move that should only be reserved for professional members of Cirq de Soleil.
Away We Go : once in awhile, you find that Diamonique in the rough.
A Life For Rent : now my keyboard is tacky and smells like sneezes
Speaking From The Crib : I have transported myself to an alternate universe, where a husband can tell the crypt keeper that his chubby wife wears an extra small thong and whips him and no one blinks an eye.
The Random Blogette : who wants teeth biting their nips!?
Busted Plumbing : My ass was as windless as a broken piccolo
Adventures In Paradise : And that? That is when I realized. They thought I was a hooker.
The Duchess Of Dorkville : She sounds like a hippo getting ass-raped.
Sassy Pants Freckle Face : Talk it over with your creatures before hand that way the bear bitches don't rape you with 6$ bear panties
The Fourth Blog Frog : One piece of anatomy I didn't need help locating was my right ovary -- because I'm pretty sure I dislodged it trying to do a move that should only be reserved for professional members of Cirq de Soleil.
Away We Go : once in awhile, you find that Diamonique in the rough.
A Life For Rent : now my keyboard is tacky and smells like sneezes
Speaking From The Crib : I have transported myself to an alternate universe, where a husband can tell the crypt keeper that his chubby wife wears an extra small thong and whips him and no one blinks an eye.
The Random Blogette : who wants teeth biting their nips!?
Busted Plumbing : My ass was as windless as a broken piccolo
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Quotes - July 6, 2010
A Walk Through My Little World : Skeeter was a randy little boy and L.O.V.E.D. my thumb in some rather disturbing ways.
Salt Says : my cats prefer chicken over fish any day of the week and neither of them are alcoholics.
My Own Brand of Crazy : wait, does that make me a whore? Spreading my legs for a tetanus shot?
Leigh vs Laundry : he would dive bomb into them, knock them over, sit on them, and then suck on their head
A Lovely Life : You don’t want to spook a moose.
Butts and Ashes : your hair would look the same way if you drove 1200 fish around in your car.
Sanity Is Overrated : I am a water balloon Ninja.
Hyperbole and a Half : This dog is uncoordinated in a way that would suggest her canine lineage is tainted with traces of a species with a different number of legs - like maybe a starfish or some sort of primitive snake.
Barefoot Foodie : I always book my departure fights so ungodly early that I don’t even actually go to bed the night before, and just arrive at the airport hungover and looking like Keith Richards
Salt Says : my cats prefer chicken over fish any day of the week and neither of them are alcoholics.
My Own Brand of Crazy : wait, does that make me a whore? Spreading my legs for a tetanus shot?
Leigh vs Laundry : he would dive bomb into them, knock them over, sit on them, and then suck on their head
A Lovely Life : You don’t want to spook a moose.
Butts and Ashes : your hair would look the same way if you drove 1200 fish around in your car.
Sanity Is Overrated : I am a water balloon Ninja.
Hyperbole and a Half : This dog is uncoordinated in a way that would suggest her canine lineage is tainted with traces of a species with a different number of legs - like maybe a starfish or some sort of primitive snake.
Barefoot Foodie : I always book my departure fights so ungodly early that I don’t even actually go to bed the night before, and just arrive at the airport hungover and looking like Keith Richards
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Quotes - June 27, 2010
Finding Fairytales : my hair was no longer a cross between "stripper" and "big bird's" love child
Pajamas & Coffee : emitted what can only be described as the type of piercing scream of a woman who has just learned she accidentally walked into church naked.
Barefoot Foodie : I was entirely certain that I had squatted in the library, forgetting that I had a skirt on, showed everyone my underwear, possibly my Jesus flower, and this ophthalmologist person was the doctor in charge of either removing it, sewing it shut, or making it so I was never allowed to have babies or grow boobs.
Lyn Upside Down : it's a long story involving an extremely high nerd factor
Salt Says : The fact that your hand is on fire might be fascinating, but you need to put it out right away.
The Meanest Mom : I always held my breath in hopes that behind a wall or underneath three layers of hideous bathroom tile we would find a stash of reindeer antlers or a petrified elf.
Alone With Cats : my diary was an early exercise in plagiarism.
Yo Mama’s Blog : So now I have office bathroom floor in my vagina.
Away We Go : At last, at last, I will be able to see the nipple rings and tribal tattoos of my fellow Southern Marylanders all year long.
All A Bunch Of Momsense : Gah, he’s cute. Even if he DOES have bugs in his ears.
Putting The FUN In DysFUNctional : watched him jumping off the couch, pretending to be Buzz Lightyear, shouting "To infillity...AND BEHIND!"
Pajamas & Coffee : emitted what can only be described as the type of piercing scream of a woman who has just learned she accidentally walked into church naked.
Barefoot Foodie : I was entirely certain that I had squatted in the library, forgetting that I had a skirt on, showed everyone my underwear, possibly my Jesus flower, and this ophthalmologist person was the doctor in charge of either removing it, sewing it shut, or making it so I was never allowed to have babies or grow boobs.
Lyn Upside Down : it's a long story involving an extremely high nerd factor
Salt Says : The fact that your hand is on fire might be fascinating, but you need to put it out right away.
The Meanest Mom : I always held my breath in hopes that behind a wall or underneath three layers of hideous bathroom tile we would find a stash of reindeer antlers or a petrified elf.
Alone With Cats : my diary was an early exercise in plagiarism.
Yo Mama’s Blog : So now I have office bathroom floor in my vagina.
Away We Go : At last, at last, I will be able to see the nipple rings and tribal tattoos of my fellow Southern Marylanders all year long.
All A Bunch Of Momsense : Gah, he’s cute. Even if he DOES have bugs in his ears.
Putting The FUN In DysFUNctional : watched him jumping off the couch, pretending to be Buzz Lightyear, shouting "To infillity...AND BEHIND!"
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Quotes - June 20, 2010
Salt Says : Usually I only develop fangirl crushes on Sesame Street characters
Lambykins : To me, if I don't have frostbite on my nipples, the air conditioner is not functioning properly.
Not That Kind Of Girl : a few weeks ago I saw a dude spread out a linen handkerchief on said unoccupied seat and spread out an honest-to-pete PICNIC on the seat next to him. Complete with friggin’ soup, the least appropriate bus food since lighter-broiled s’mores.
Life With Flowers : They are fond of their hanging meats.
The Meanest Mom : An unfortunate typo resulted in Mr. Quacker's conversion to the Religious Society of Friends.
Beth: A Work In Progress : I really don’t like bacon bits in my banana pudding
The Zen of Motherhood : I've always been partial to the Great Flying Middle Finger.
Motherhood Uncensored : I'm pregnant with Mary Poppins!
Lambykins : To me, if I don't have frostbite on my nipples, the air conditioner is not functioning properly.
Not That Kind Of Girl : a few weeks ago I saw a dude spread out a linen handkerchief on said unoccupied seat and spread out an honest-to-pete PICNIC on the seat next to him. Complete with friggin’ soup, the least appropriate bus food since lighter-broiled s’mores.
Life With Flowers : They are fond of their hanging meats.
The Meanest Mom : An unfortunate typo resulted in Mr. Quacker's conversion to the Religious Society of Friends.
Beth: A Work In Progress : I really don’t like bacon bits in my banana pudding
The Zen of Motherhood : I've always been partial to the Great Flying Middle Finger.
Motherhood Uncensored : I'm pregnant with Mary Poppins!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Quotes - June 5, 2010
Office_Cubism : Thank you for your radish management
Eternally Distracted : May the only pain in your life be champagne.
Peeling An Orange with A Screwdriver : Kids make you do things you never thought possible and it all starts the minute you shove them out of that impossibly small exit between your legs.
Mom and Mommer : remember you have the power of the mystical vagina on your side
The Bean : I bet I dream about drunk unicorns tonight.
The Bloggess : comforters are like giant shamwows
Not That Kind of Girl : Bathroom breaks at work are approximately 500% more fun when you spend thirty seconds twisting your pelvis to admire the light playing on your crotch disco ball.
Stacie’s Madness : Mr.F and I will be doing it Paul Bunyan style.
Alone With Cats : you’re wondering how wicked cool it would have been to go to college in the fucking air?
Eternally Distracted : May the only pain in your life be champagne.
Peeling An Orange with A Screwdriver : Kids make you do things you never thought possible and it all starts the minute you shove them out of that impossibly small exit between your legs.
Mom and Mommer : remember you have the power of the mystical vagina on your side
The Bean : I bet I dream about drunk unicorns tonight.
The Bloggess : comforters are like giant shamwows
Not That Kind of Girl : Bathroom breaks at work are approximately 500% more fun when you spend thirty seconds twisting your pelvis to admire the light playing on your crotch disco ball.
Stacie’s Madness : Mr.F and I will be doing it Paul Bunyan style.
Alone With Cats : you’re wondering how wicked cool it would have been to go to college in the fucking air?
Monday, May 24, 2010
Quotes - May 24, 2010
The Queen of WTF : The moral of this story...Don't let the second graders mix your drinks.
Not That Kind Of Girl : I am: about as seductive as a stomach flu.
Hyperbole and A Half : no matter how many decoy items you buy, you still feel positive that the checker is going to notice your conspicuous purchase and think you are some twisted freak with explosive diarrhea.
Yankee Girl guest post on Speaking From the Crib : According to Leland, there is nothing that cannot be solved by naked women.
Eternally Distracted : There is a simple solutions to everything... Champagne!
Off On A Tangent : I have a date with a sharpie and a roll of blue masking tape!
Picture Imperfect : Life's a birch and then you die!
Unknown Mami : "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the ignorant city girl that thinks roosters hump eggs."
Chronical of Linnnn : my clothes just fell off around him. Spontaneous disrobement.
Airing My Dirty Laundry... One Sock At A Time : STOP LIFTING UP YOUR SHIRT AND FLASHING THE CARS. You are NOT A KARDASHIAN SISTER!
Ann Again and Again : Perhaps it's Twitter Tourette Syndrome.
Not That Kind Of Girl : I am: about as seductive as a stomach flu.
Hyperbole and A Half : no matter how many decoy items you buy, you still feel positive that the checker is going to notice your conspicuous purchase and think you are some twisted freak with explosive diarrhea.
Yankee Girl guest post on Speaking From the Crib : According to Leland, there is nothing that cannot be solved by naked women.
Eternally Distracted : There is a simple solutions to everything... Champagne!
Off On A Tangent : I have a date with a sharpie and a roll of blue masking tape!
Picture Imperfect : Life's a birch and then you die!
Unknown Mami : "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the ignorant city girl that thinks roosters hump eggs."
Chronical of Linnnn : my clothes just fell off around him. Spontaneous disrobement.
Airing My Dirty Laundry... One Sock At A Time : STOP LIFTING UP YOUR SHIRT AND FLASHING THE CARS. You are NOT A KARDASHIAN SISTER!
Ann Again and Again : Perhaps it's Twitter Tourette Syndrome.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Quotes - May 7, 2010
Punk Rock HR : I look better as a washed-out-blonde with dark roots than I do as a woman with green hair.
I Am Lotus : We have a Peep down, people. I repeat, PEEP DOWN.
As Cape Cod Turns : Who knew your butt has springs?
Eternally Distracted : "Look Mum, my nails have changed a different language"
Astoria Oregon Rust : Yes, the opening act had more musical talent than I; however they didn’t have the common sense not to subject others to their talent.
i’m Not benny : if you are a kangaroo and happen to be riddled with the rabies, all you do is crave the taste of old people.
Unknown Mami : “Our teacher was sick, so we had a prostitute teacher.”
Not That Kind of Girl : Something about this picture really screams "diphteria!" to me.
Eternally Distracted : SHE IS STEALING MY OCD!!!
Yo Mama’s Blog : You guys are like the United Nations of morons.
UberGrumpy : he looked like a mini Conehead after a brutal deathmatch mud-wrestle.
Unknown Mami Mayonnaise was introduced to the United States on May 5th, 1862 when a native of Puebla visiting relatives in the US whipped up a batch and was walking down the street with a bowl of mayo and bumped into an American eating a dry tuna sandwich.
I Am Lotus : We have a Peep down, people. I repeat, PEEP DOWN.
As Cape Cod Turns : Who knew your butt has springs?
Eternally Distracted : "Look Mum, my nails have changed a different language"
Astoria Oregon Rust : Yes, the opening act had more musical talent than I; however they didn’t have the common sense not to subject others to their talent.
i’m Not benny : if you are a kangaroo and happen to be riddled with the rabies, all you do is crave the taste of old people.
Unknown Mami : “Our teacher was sick, so we had a prostitute teacher.”
Not That Kind of Girl : Something about this picture really screams "diphteria!" to me.
Eternally Distracted : SHE IS STEALING MY OCD!!!
Yo Mama’s Blog : You guys are like the United Nations of morons.
UberGrumpy : he looked like a mini Conehead after a brutal deathmatch mud-wrestle.
Unknown Mami Mayonnaise was introduced to the United States on May 5th, 1862 when a native of Puebla visiting relatives in the US whipped up a batch and was walking down the street with a bowl of mayo and bumped into an American eating a dry tuna sandwich.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Quotes - April 24, 2010
Stir Fry Awesomeness : Your spawn will not cease climbing you like monkeys on a banana hunt just because you are on vacation.
Mrs. 4444 Cooks : Do NOT poke the holes all the way down to the bottom; just do it half-way. (But remember, you can still get pregnant going half-way.)
Fruit On The Vines : I need to end thiz pozt and fix my keyboard. I'm tired of my wordz looking like youtube commentz.
Mrs. Yellow Hat : I did not need that sort of a reminder that I've had 3 children and need to continue my kegels.
The Rational Mind of A Crazy Woman : I'm pretty sure cinnamon rolls are a common cure for whooping cough
Just Eat It : Just remind me that I need stuff for my vagina and stuff for my coffee.
Busted Plumbing : Can I get Zoloft prescribed for my cooter?
Thyme For Cooking : It's one thing to buy too much food when you have a teenage boy at home. Oh, wait, if memory serves me, it's impossible to buy too much food when you have teenage boys.
My Own Brand Of Crazy : What goes up, must come down - preferably with fire.
Bye Bye Pie : I kind of like it. In a Miss Piggy drag queen Priscilla Queen of the Desert LSD Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy kind of a way.
Mrs. 4444 Cooks : Do NOT poke the holes all the way down to the bottom; just do it half-way. (But remember, you can still get pregnant going half-way.)
Fruit On The Vines : I need to end thiz pozt and fix my keyboard. I'm tired of my wordz looking like youtube commentz.
Mrs. Yellow Hat : I did not need that sort of a reminder that I've had 3 children and need to continue my kegels.
The Rational Mind of A Crazy Woman : I'm pretty sure cinnamon rolls are a common cure for whooping cough
Just Eat It : Just remind me that I need stuff for my vagina and stuff for my coffee.
Busted Plumbing : Can I get Zoloft prescribed for my cooter?
Thyme For Cooking : It's one thing to buy too much food when you have a teenage boy at home. Oh, wait, if memory serves me, it's impossible to buy too much food when you have teenage boys.
My Own Brand Of Crazy : What goes up, must come down - preferably with fire.
Bye Bye Pie : I kind of like it. In a Miss Piggy drag queen Priscilla Queen of the Desert LSD Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy kind of a way.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Quotes - April 14, 2010
Unknown Mami : I think you invented a word: VAGINORMOUS!
Daily Dose of Reality : When I say dance, I mean just move from side to side and not stomp on people's feet.
Sprite’s Keeper : Parents have to love the ocean. It's like one giant wet wipe.
Bye Bye Pie : They all ceased talking to stare at me. It was like I was E.F. Hutton, but I was more Peed On Myself Hutton.
Gladys Tells All : I am now a poop reader.
Jen’s Voices : Big dummy doesn't know style and rhythm if it came up and cabbage patched him in the butt.
Mo "Mad Dog" Stoneskin : She tottered up to the bar with all the deportment of a tap-dancing piglet.
UberGrumpy : always ski drunk, so you can be relaxed and even amused as you fall over, hit trees, lose a pole, collide with a French snowboarder, etc.
Finding Fairytales : apparently it was so totally awesome. like coming across a three eyed zebra in downtown buttfuckville, awesome.
My Own Brand Of Crazy : We're at the Felon Orthopedic Clinic!
Daily Dose of Reality : When I say dance, I mean just move from side to side and not stomp on people's feet.
Sprite’s Keeper : Parents have to love the ocean. It's like one giant wet wipe.
Bye Bye Pie : They all ceased talking to stare at me. It was like I was E.F. Hutton, but I was more Peed On Myself Hutton.
Gladys Tells All : I am now a poop reader.
Jen’s Voices : Big dummy doesn't know style and rhythm if it came up and cabbage patched him in the butt.
Mo "Mad Dog" Stoneskin : She tottered up to the bar with all the deportment of a tap-dancing piglet.
UberGrumpy : always ski drunk, so you can be relaxed and even amused as you fall over, hit trees, lose a pole, collide with a French snowboarder, etc.
Finding Fairytales : apparently it was so totally awesome. like coming across a three eyed zebra in downtown buttfuckville, awesome.
My Own Brand Of Crazy : We're at the Felon Orthopedic Clinic!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Quotes - April 7, 2010
Sara Spelled Without An H : he looks like a walking zygote with lip gloss
The White Trash Princess : almost bought a two-foot-long plastic "action figure?" frilled lizard. Very realistic-looking. Had toes missing off of the back foot that someone had painted red with nail polish to resemble blood as if this plastic reptile had been subject to plastic action figure animal abuse in an underground plastic action figure lizard cage fighting ring or something.
Homesteading Neophyte : There is something slightly unsettling about a white trash genius.
The Stroller Ballet : everything related to children leaks
Hyperbole and A Half : it just ends up looking like something created by a schizophrenic baboon with a bear fetish and an endless supply of finger paint
Finding Fairy Tales : i need to lie down and fart
Dirt and Noise : I was going all Aesop on them
The Bloggess : This is basically the secret of life: Move toward things that make you less stabby.
Bye Bye Pie : Marvin knows how to perform a tracheotomy on me because he looked it up and searched my throat
A Beaten Copper Lamp of Deplorable Design : Where's comb-over Jesus?
The White Trash Princess : almost bought a two-foot-long plastic "action figure?" frilled lizard. Very realistic-looking. Had toes missing off of the back foot that someone had painted red with nail polish to resemble blood as if this plastic reptile had been subject to plastic action figure animal abuse in an underground plastic action figure lizard cage fighting ring or something.
Homesteading Neophyte : There is something slightly unsettling about a white trash genius.
The Stroller Ballet : everything related to children leaks
Hyperbole and A Half : it just ends up looking like something created by a schizophrenic baboon with a bear fetish and an endless supply of finger paint
Finding Fairy Tales : i need to lie down and fart
Dirt and Noise : I was going all Aesop on them
The Bloggess : This is basically the secret of life: Move toward things that make you less stabby.
Bye Bye Pie : Marvin knows how to perform a tracheotomy on me because he looked it up and searched my throat
A Beaten Copper Lamp of Deplorable Design : Where's comb-over Jesus?
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