What?

Originally the idea came from a local radio station. They kept "The List", a list of phrases said during the week that stood on their own and were funny as hell. They were phrases that not only inspired giggles and snorts, but frequently prompted the question "what brought THAT up?" When playing on a messageboard I would frequently see something that would remind me of The List. Finally I broke down and started recording them. I've done this for about four years... five years? It's been a while. Lo and behold I'm noticing the same thing in the blog world. So why not? Let's have our quotables recorded!

Friday, April 23, 2010

Quotes - April 24, 2010

Stir Fry Awesomeness    : Your spawn will not cease climbing you like monkeys on a banana hunt just because you are on vacation.

Mrs. 4444 Cooks    : Do NOT poke the holes all the way down to the bottom; just do it half-way. (But remember, you can still get pregnant going half-way.)

Fruit On The Vines    : I need to end thiz pozt and fix my keyboard. I'm tired of my wordz looking like youtube commentz.

Mrs. Yellow Hat    : I did not need that sort of a reminder that I've had 3 children and need to continue my kegels.

The Rational Mind of  A Crazy Woman    : I'm pretty sure cinnamon rolls are a common cure for whooping cough

Just Eat It    : Just remind me that I need stuff for my vagina and stuff for my coffee.

Busted Plumbing    : Can I get Zoloft prescribed for my cooter?

Thyme For Cooking    : It's one thing to buy too much food when you have a teenage boy at home.  Oh, wait, if memory serves me, it's impossible to buy too much food when you have teenage boys.

My Own Brand Of Crazy    : What goes up, must come down - preferably with fire.

Bye Bye Pie    : I kind of like it. In a Miss Piggy drag queen Priscilla Queen of the Desert LSD Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy kind of a way.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Quotes - April 14, 2010

Unknown Mami    : I think you invented a word: VAGINORMOUS!

Daily Dose of Reality    : When I say dance, I mean just move from side to side and not stomp on people's feet.

Sprite’s Keeper    : Parents have to love the ocean. It's like one giant wet wipe.

Bye Bye Pie    : They all ceased talking to stare at me. It was like I was E.F. Hutton, but I was more Peed On Myself Hutton.

Gladys Tells All    : I am now a poop reader.

Jen’s Voices    : Big dummy doesn't know style and rhythm if it came up and cabbage patched him in the butt.

Mo "Mad Dog" Stoneskin    : She tottered up to the bar with all the deportment of a tap-dancing piglet.

UberGrumpy    : always ski drunk, so you can be relaxed and even amused as you fall over, hit trees, lose a pole, collide with a French snowboarder, etc.

Finding Fairytales    : apparently it was so totally awesome. like coming across a three eyed zebra in downtown buttfuckville, awesome.

My Own Brand Of Crazy    : We're at the Felon Orthopedic Clinic!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Quotes - April 7, 2010

 Sara Spelled Without An H    : he looks like a walking zygote with lip gloss

The White Trash Princess    : almost bought a two-foot-long plastic "action figure?" frilled lizard.  Very realistic-looking.  Had toes missing off of the back foot that someone had painted red with nail polish to resemble blood as if this plastic reptile had been subject to plastic action figure animal abuse in an underground  plastic action figure lizard cage fighting ring or something.

Homesteading Neophyte    : There is something slightly unsettling about a white trash genius.

The Stroller Ballet    : everything related to children leaks

Hyperbole and A Half    : it just ends up looking like something created by a schizophrenic baboon with a bear fetish and an endless supply of finger paint

Finding Fairy Tales    : i need to lie down and fart

Dirt and Noise    : I was going all Aesop on them

The Bloggess    : This is basically the secret of life: Move toward things that make you less stabby.

Bye Bye Pie    : Marvin knows how to perform a tracheotomy on me because he looked it up and searched my throat

A Beaten Copper Lamp of Deplorable Design    : Where's comb-over Jesus?